Changing my story = Changing my Life
FREEDOM
Freedom comes with Responsibility. Responsibility of our role in the story, which we can create again and again and so change can happen.
Once we edit our story, the next chapter is much easier to write/much easier to change
– We are all unreliable narrators of our own lives.
– To tell a story is inescapably to take a moral stance.
– Stories are the way we make sense of our lives. – The way we narrate our lives shapes what they become.
– Change, even really positive change, involves a surprising amount of loss.
– What would happen if you looked at your story and wrote it from another person’s point of view?
– Life is about choosing which stories to listen to, and which ones need an edit.
– There’s nothing more important to the quality of our lives than the stories we tell ourselves about them.
What do you want your story to be? Go write your masterpiece!
TOOL – Think about a story you are telling yourself right now that may not be serving you right now?
My example –
I can’t focus and start on studying because what if I fail and can’t study?
I don’t want to waste my time doing masters program just to make $70K/year at the beginning.
I can’t start my business because no one in COVID has money to pay or I am not good at sales
Q: Who are people helping you holding the wrong version of this story?
- No one.
- Some postings online or avg on ALIS
- My past self that failed on NSC 1.0
Deliver yourself compassionate truth bombs – wise compassion
What is the narrator not willing to see?
- That I may need to re-learn how to study. Will the sacrifice of working on the weekends, studying after Rose goes to bed be worth spending on studying, writing papers when Ryan and I could be bonding? Will the sacrifice of money put us behind on getting a house in Calgary that is our own or will I be able to pay back the big student loan debt I am taking on?
- What if I can’t do it? I have become an excessive worrier because of anxiety of the unknown like it happened with Jayden – like I won’t be able to keep up!. I need to take action ASAP. and find out
What if you stepped out of your story and wrote it from another person’s point of view?
You have done so amazing and you need to continue writing new stories of courage and living! Doing what you think you can’t do and do it to help others.
We have to write a new version of our story to see what the plot could become.
Life is about knowing which stories to listen to and which ones need and EDIT. And its worth the effort going through edit.
WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE. – REALITY CHECK!
What do I want my story to be?
Loosing Jayden when I did, after starting my newly launched NSC business doing so well, having so much ambition and seeing results fairly soon had me believing I could do amazing things! I lost him 10 months after I started my business, 9 of those months I was pregnant with him. I still worked hard in my pregnancy and had 3 full-time clients.
When I lost Jayden, I also slowly slowly lost my business. I lost my passion, overtaken by the dark clouds of grief and loss, I started to lose myself.
Now I lost Jayden, 2 more miscarriages, my business, my ambitions, my goals, dreams and hopes, almost my marriage. All this loss took a toll on me and I really lost my confidence, belief in myself.
I continued to work hard, trying to figure out a way out of this hell and then I became suicidal.
Then I seeked help! And it did help….
Then I stopped until I got better and had 2 more miscarriages
Then I went to go see her again and got pregnant again…
Then Rose came and she was so difficult the first 6 months, she was colic.
Then I started grieving and feeling awful
Then I seeked counseling and found a group and turned another chapter of healing
Then INDIA help and I struggled alot there too, good with the bad
And now I can feel struggling again. I am trying, doing the right things but I can feel me struggling again/gasping for air again.
What I need to do NOW is the opposite of what my anxiety is telling me to do. I need to do, take action in the direction of my dreams! I can harness old Nav again in the form of new Nav and New Nav still knows how to take action in the direction of her dreams ❤
I KNOW:
- The fastest way to melt worry is to take MASSIVE ACTION
- The action is to put Rose in Daycare, so I feel accountable for my time
- When Rose is in daycare, I can:
- – Study for Psych 289 course – EDUCATION
- – Continue with HL Bootcamp – CAREER
- – Coaching my client – MONEY
- – Apply for FT jobs – CAREER
- – Do interviews etc. – CAREER
- – Settle in our home in Calgary – EMOTIONAL HEALTH/RELATIONSHIP
- – Home errands – Cook, clean, groceries – LIFE
- – Self Care – FOUNDATION
This will actually makes me more productive, less stretched and enjoy my time with Rose.
And thinking and worrying excessively has a negative impact on your body. Take some action, make progress and course correct as you go along. Your body needs relaxation, joy, excitement of new possibilities and not just catastrophizing of everything going wrong!
You got this, take the right action, 1 foot infront of the other and watch the magic unfold!
xx
Still Jayden's mom 